What Other Birthparents Say About Adoption

"Knowing that 'my kids' are being raised by a mom and dad who's whole world revolves around them is a great benefit; I never worry. Adoption doesn't have to be an experience to be ashamed of. I'm proud of the decision I made and the fact that 'my kids' will have opportunities I couldn't provide."

-- Amy, birthmother to Ellie and Isaac, on what she wishes others knew about adoption.

"I was very nervous, so when I met them I had some close friends come with me. It has changed because I'm not so nervous now and they are just another part of my life that I'm proud of."

--Jessica, Birthmother to Nathan, on adjusting to open adoption.

"I thought I could give her up and forget about her, with no strings attached. It may sound sad, but its being honest. I had to learn to accept it and deal with it. I lost the bonding between a child and parent. I gave birth to her, but I don't know her. I don't feel her pain, see her smiles, watch her take her first step, say her first word. As a birthparent it's hard to get adjusted to giving your child away, but it's not like you're giving your child away. You, as a parent, must put your child's interest first... Life is not perfect or fair. Everyday I think of my child, but it gets easier. I watch her grow up in pictures and everyday I thank the Lord that I got to bring this Angel into this world, even if it means that someone else will have the joys, heartaches, pains, and happiness of this child. I brought happiness to a couple that couldn't have that happiness unless a birthparent like me gave it to them. So to me that is the most fulfilling gift I could ask for and I'm very proud of that... If you are having second thoughts about the adoption, that is normal. As a birthparent I will always play the "what if" in my head, but deep in my heart I'm happy with the choice I made."

-- Jody, Birthmother to Joely, on the joys and pains of adoption.